Little Jolly Rancher

I was told that to become a good writer, you need to write about not just the things that come easily to you, but the hard stuff too. The things that scare you. The things that make you cry. So, that’s what I’m here to do today.

This post  has been in my heart and mind for many months now, bumping around, forming itself into something that is now telling me it’s time. It’s time to let it out there and hope that in doing so it will encourage someone else.

Little Jolly Rancher ~ From a Montana Front Porch

Everyone, meet Little Jolly Rancher. Aptly nicknamed by an uncle that got it right. He is always happy, and sticky, just like a Jolly Rancher. He is a joy in his laughter and his smile that starts in his eyes and moves out to encompass his whole being. Full of energy and never sitting still like every little boy is supposed to be, he loves to be in the thick of it all, especially when his siblings and other kids are present. He reminds me daily how to embrace every happy moment that comes along and shows me how to not let the little things get me down. He is the embodiment of the word try. He is my joy and constant source of laughter, and he has Cerebral Palsey.

I don’t say that out-loud.   Ever.

Why? Because yes, he has a severe muscle delay which means he can’t walk or talk yet, but that is not who he is. He is not a disability. He is a little boy who has been given a big hurdle to cross, but it is not his future.  I do not want him growing up and being held back, or worse, holding himself back, because of a label.

Little Jolly Rancher ~ From a Montana Front Porch

His CP is a reason why some things are the way they are, but it will never be an excuse. That is why I never say it out-loud. Even when we are approached with the question. It seems innocent enough, but it is always asked after a stranger has been observing Jolly Rancher and noticed some of his quirks. They will come and ask how old he is. Simple enough, but the fact that they never ask about the other kids is what gives it away. I always respond the same way, a smile, his age, and…nothing else.  In response you receive the vague “oh”, followed by an awkward silence where the mental questions and responses swirl around in the air between you but never get spoken.  Even though  the quick explanation of  “he has CP” is right there waiting to be said, I don’t allow myself to go that far.

As parents, we want to explain why things are the way they are, because we don’t want someone to think bad things about our kids when they throw a fit or don’t respond to a question or simply just ignore you. That one little phrase, he has CP, could make things easier I suppose.  In this case though, I like to think I am doing the right thing by keeping his future open to all possibilities. I never want him to think for one second that he himself can use it as an excuse to not give his all. He has big things in his future and we are doing everything we can to make sure a silly little label can’t stand in his way.

Little Jolly Rancher ~ From a Montana Front Porch

There are so many things that I could go into on this subject but I am going to stop for now. I need to sit back, have a cup of tea, and say another prayer that putting this out there is going to help someone, because like I said, it is not something I just casually talk about. Thank you for letting me ramble.

Love from here,

Bobbie

 

 

 

 

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35 thoughts on “Little Jolly Rancher

  1. I love that kid not only for the wonderful little boy that he is, but also because he always greets me with a HUGE smile and makes me feel good. He’s a winner!

  2. Our love and prayers and hope are with you.

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    From a Montana Front Porch posted: “I was told that to become a good writer, you need to write about not just the things that come easily to you, but the hard stuff too. The things that scare you. The things that make you cry. So, that’s what I’m here to do today.

    This post has been in “

  3. It’s most important to know a child for who he is, not his age, his label, his mental, emotional or spiritual capacity. It’s a package deal. We cannot separate one from the other – the Jolly Rancher is WHOLE just as he is. I love you. And your writing.

    Give that sticky kid a kiss from his NC auntie at Hope Farms 😉

  4. Shared from the heart. I felt your mother heart. LIttle Jolly Rancher will continue to grow with joy and promise in his future. How fortunate for him he has mother like yourself. And how fortunate for you and your family, you have Little Jolly Rancher. Blessings shared back …

  5. Bobbie, thank you for sharing that. I was saying “Yes!” out loud as I read this. I so agree with you about not holding your son back because of CP, allowing him to have a crutch for a particular behaviour or lack of, etc.
    I wanted to hug you…. and that precious smiling boy!

    You are truly a blessed mama.

    Oh, and another thought I had and I shared it with Casey (my husband) was I am so glad y’all have chosen to live on a ranch in Montana instead of the suburbs somewhere. I think your son has more opportunity to be who God has for him to be by living out in the middle of a beautiful no where and being with his family. 🙂

    Much love from Texas.

    Janet…. mamachildress

    • Thank you Janet, for your thoughts and kind words. We too, are grateful that we can raise our children here and yes, especially Jolly Rancher. There are many new things we are going to be doing with him this year, including horseback riding! I will be posting more on that I am sure. 🙂 ~ Bobbie

  6. Thank you Bobbie for sharing your son with us. I have a feeling that you are just a wonderful mother. What a beautiful smile your son has!!!

  7. Every child is a gift from God and we each have our own challenges. He seems so happy and you guys seem to be doing a great job. Keep the faith. Deborah

  8. I was touched by your blog today. This is my first read of your thoughts. I was not expecting your wonderful introduction to Jolly Rancher but I was filled with smiles and hope as I read your powerful words about your son. He sounds like a special young man that fills life with laughter and excitement. I am a grandpa for two incredible little boys and they can make the sun shine brighter on any given day. Thank you for your transparency and perspective.

  9. Pingback: I cried in church today | From a Montana Front Porch

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